First, a hopefully helpful but absolutely necessary comment on taking verses out of context:
If you want to develop your understanding of a Christian life, you need to bring the whole bible into discussion, not 0.05% of it.
You can't understand calculus if you leave out algebra.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It seems to me one of greatest stumbling blocks in Christianity is the idea of authority; women are not to be in positions of ultimate authority within the church, and women are told to submit to their husbands. We struggle with this. Why aren't women and men exactly the same? Why don't they do at all times and all places the exact same thing? The obvious answer for that is, well, they aren't exactly the same. This is easiest to perceive in our physiology; although we have many, many similarities because we are both humans, we still have different parts which have different functions. This tangible, irrefutable difference is easily and openly accepted, and I at least don't regularly hear anyone arguing that women are superior or inferior because they are the ones to carry the baby for 9 months. We don't debate it. It is what it is.
Move over to the intangible and we are not so okay with the idea of differences. Why is that? We all accept that there are women and there are men, right? We accept they have fundamentally different roles in certain physical processes, right? Is it so hard to believe that they have different roles spiritually? It's okay to want to be equal, because we are; we are all one in Christ (Galatians 3:28). But, don't kid yourself, women and men are different. Mull that over a while if you still struggle with it.
Please remember the above point: strip away culture, strip away tradition, strip away in some cases a history of ruthless suppression, and you STILL HAVE fundamental differences between women and men. Societies may have abused women, but it didn't create them. Women and men are different no matter what culture has to say about it. Do you accept this point? That regardless of all of the good and bad cultural overlay, women and men are different? Recognizing and distinguishing that there are two sexes doesn't make you OR the bible sexist.
Now that we've set the table, let's lay out the meat. Just as women and men were created with certain different physical roles, they have different spiritual roles as well. In the garden before the fall, God made Adam and gave him commands; then, He made Eve. Adam was to share God's role for him with Eve, and Eve was to help Adam fulfill God's commands to shepherd all living things and their lives together would glorify God. Thus: Eve was subject to Adam; she helped him carry out the command given him by God. That isn't a bad thing! In fact, Adam wasn't adequate, he wasn't "good", without Eve! And that's the relationship that is to be reflected in our marriages today: both persons seeking the will of the Lord. Unfortunately, because of the fall, this by default has to look differently than it did in the garden because all things have been distorted by sin, but we are to strive for righteousness nonetheless. This means worshiping and serving the Lord as close to the manner that was in Eden as we can, and how we do that is laid out in the bible, for example, in the popularly misinterpreted Ephesians.
If you examine a Christian marriage (that is, one where both people are striving for righteousness; not where one or both may or may not occasionally sit in a pew), it's a complete partnership - it is one-ship. The idea of one member ruling over the other is beyond comprehension, because in such a relationship both people view their spouse as part of themselves - they are one being. How does such a marriage come into existence and then persist in this perverse world? It happens when people stop being obsessed with themselves and look together to the Lord.
If you or someone you know has experienced oppression or abuse, and even if they experienced it under the facade of "Christian teaching", it wasn't Christian! People are flawed and can do horrendously wrong things, I will be the first to agree with you on that and will never try to excuse bad/horrible behavior. But God's word and God's will (not to be confused with our attempt at carrying it out) are perfect. Don't judge Him on what we, even and especially Christians, as humans do; that's just a foolish argument. Would you judge Mozart as a failure if you heard his symphonies played by untrained 5th graders? Don't judge the Lord based on humankind's iniquities.
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Sunday, April 8, 2012
Women's Roles in the church
Until recently, the most boat-rocking experience I had encountered in my life as a Christian was when I stumbled over women's roles in the church. The distinctions (which I may have previously inappropriately dubbed "limitations") hit me like a solid blow to the chest. I was not used to being told I couldn't do something because I was a woman, and definitely not by people who I thought loved me. In my head the roles of men and women translated into the distaste and disinterest of the church in my faith. They didn't care about what I had to offer, and didn't want me to be active in church life.
Confused by the unfathomable amount of love I felt coming from the same group of people who seemed to be smothering and diminishing my worth, I put myself into a tizzy. Upset and discouraged, I dove into the scriptures and sought advice from people I trusted. Okay okay, first I lost my grip and had to be gently but firmly brought back to reality by someone wise beyond his years and loving beyond my ability to comprehend. Additionally, I prayed and prayed.
I never came to an "A-ha!" moment, but I did find some peace. I believe with all my heart that the words of the scriptures are right and true, and to the best of my ability I am determined not to warp them to my wishes or to support my desires. With that as my foundation, there are enough passages in scripture to confirm that there are things women do that men do not, and there are things that men do that women do not do. End of story.
The fudgey part is in the details... that's why I said I have found some peace. If one were to ask me to give definitively what a woman should and should not do, my answer would have clear and murky points, and almost all of them would be feebly supported. I feel that women are not meant to be in complete authority, as is said in 1 Tim 2:11-12, but I don't listen at all to the need to keep my head covered. Why don't I listen to that last part? Ask me in a few months. I'm currently reading the whole bible, and am praying for peace on the matter to come in time. For now, the best I can say is that people I trust as God loving and fearing men and women also don't heed the head covering passage, so, neither do I.
The pain caused by the topic of roles was compounded by my then growing desire to share my faith with the church. Regularly I sat and listened to the testimony of others and was moved and motivated by their words. Desperately I wanted to return the favor by offering my own testimony, fueled by my ever increasing passion for God. As a new believer, the furnace in my heart was ablaze and I longed to yell it from the mountain tops and edify the men and women who had already done so much to edify me.
But then I found out I couldn't. I couldn't get up in front of the church and tell them about how Jesus touched my life, about the role He plays and the glory of God. The one major yearning in my heart... and I was forbidden from it...
Stop.
That's where I got it all wrong. No one was cutting my vocal chords. No one was turning their head and refusing to listen. It is true, I had felt an overwhelming desire to sing and preach, and in truth, I still do. But when I found out I couldn't do it in the very specific way I wanted, I grew angry and developed tunnel vision. If I couldn't preach... I couldn't do anything! There wouldn't be any way to edify the church! There wouldn't be any way for me to be a functioning member of the body!
Oh, praise the Lord that I have overcome that. It was a dark place in my head at those times. Dark and suffocating. But then, something happened and I was able to realize there are so many roles in the church, and all of them so powerful and crucial. In fact, some of the most profound influences that acted on me were the behind the scenes and under the surface goodness, gentleness and service shown to me by... women! Godly, amazing women. If I could follow their lead and touch even just one life as these women have touched mine, I would feel like I have pleased the Lord.
The moral of this blog goes like this:
I don't know what the precise roles of women are, but I do understand that women and men were created with distinct roles because, well, some people are women and some people are men. If there wasn't a reason for both of us, we wouldn't have both been made in Eden. As a woman, I feel called to share with others, and though I haven't found precisely the way I am best suited to do this, I am open to whatever method the Lord has for me, and am at peace that I was not made for ultimate authority. Even more so, I have come to realize that Godly women are such beautiful creatures that we often barely see them at work, more commonly we just enjoy and are blessed by them long before realizing their service.
If that is the woman God has called me to be, that would be fine with me. In fact, I would say Praise the Lord.
Confused by the unfathomable amount of love I felt coming from the same group of people who seemed to be smothering and diminishing my worth, I put myself into a tizzy. Upset and discouraged, I dove into the scriptures and sought advice from people I trusted. Okay okay, first I lost my grip and had to be gently but firmly brought back to reality by someone wise beyond his years and loving beyond my ability to comprehend. Additionally, I prayed and prayed.
I never came to an "A-ha!" moment, but I did find some peace. I believe with all my heart that the words of the scriptures are right and true, and to the best of my ability I am determined not to warp them to my wishes or to support my desires. With that as my foundation, there are enough passages in scripture to confirm that there are things women do that men do not, and there are things that men do that women do not do. End of story.
The fudgey part is in the details... that's why I said I have found some peace. If one were to ask me to give definitively what a woman should and should not do, my answer would have clear and murky points, and almost all of them would be feebly supported. I feel that women are not meant to be in complete authority, as is said in 1 Tim 2:11-12, but I don't listen at all to the need to keep my head covered. Why don't I listen to that last part? Ask me in a few months. I'm currently reading the whole bible, and am praying for peace on the matter to come in time. For now, the best I can say is that people I trust as God loving and fearing men and women also don't heed the head covering passage, so, neither do I.
The pain caused by the topic of roles was compounded by my then growing desire to share my faith with the church. Regularly I sat and listened to the testimony of others and was moved and motivated by their words. Desperately I wanted to return the favor by offering my own testimony, fueled by my ever increasing passion for God. As a new believer, the furnace in my heart was ablaze and I longed to yell it from the mountain tops and edify the men and women who had already done so much to edify me.
But then I found out I couldn't. I couldn't get up in front of the church and tell them about how Jesus touched my life, about the role He plays and the glory of God. The one major yearning in my heart... and I was forbidden from it...
Stop.
That's where I got it all wrong. No one was cutting my vocal chords. No one was turning their head and refusing to listen. It is true, I had felt an overwhelming desire to sing and preach, and in truth, I still do. But when I found out I couldn't do it in the very specific way I wanted, I grew angry and developed tunnel vision. If I couldn't preach... I couldn't do anything! There wouldn't be any way to edify the church! There wouldn't be any way for me to be a functioning member of the body!
Oh, praise the Lord that I have overcome that. It was a dark place in my head at those times. Dark and suffocating. But then, something happened and I was able to realize there are so many roles in the church, and all of them so powerful and crucial. In fact, some of the most profound influences that acted on me were the behind the scenes and under the surface goodness, gentleness and service shown to me by... women! Godly, amazing women. If I could follow their lead and touch even just one life as these women have touched mine, I would feel like I have pleased the Lord.
The moral of this blog goes like this:
I don't know what the precise roles of women are, but I do understand that women and men were created with distinct roles because, well, some people are women and some people are men. If there wasn't a reason for both of us, we wouldn't have both been made in Eden. As a woman, I feel called to share with others, and though I haven't found precisely the way I am best suited to do this, I am open to whatever method the Lord has for me, and am at peace that I was not made for ultimate authority. Even more so, I have come to realize that Godly women are such beautiful creatures that we often barely see them at work, more commonly we just enjoy and are blessed by them long before realizing their service.
If that is the woman God has called me to be, that would be fine with me. In fact, I would say Praise the Lord.
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